via jostanbeeber

Meme 4 2day~

via Indexed

I’ve assessed the situation—turns out I’m on the far right of the x-axis.

Do I need new friends?

Just wanna be escorted on a Harley like Mandy!

drinkyourjuice:

[phantasmagorium:pbh3]

Apparently, the only keys to successful dating in the 1930’s for ladies were don’t talk too much, wear a bra, and don’t pass out in the middle of your date because you’re drunk.

I would have needed to be with an openminded-ass dude in 1938.

See also: 2010

Remember the Sweet Valley High saga from the early ’90s?

“All’s fair in love and high school….” HOLLA BACK.

When I was about eight, I was introduced to this series when experiencing a crushing blow to my self-esteem after my language arts archnemesis accused me of still being a first grader because I was still reading “Babysitter’s Club.”

Ho, I could spell “babysitter”!

Anyway.

This marked the beginning of a new era for me. Based on the lives of two All-American twins living in southern California, the series revolved around their social and love lives, including all the banal details of everyone else in their existential vicinity. Shockingly, high school was so dramatic and life-affirming at the same time. Scandals depicted were things like pimples, formulating a strategy during lunch to ask out Tom to the prom, getting your reputation destroyed after your ex-best-friend who never returned your pink pumps called you a slut for flirting with her boyfriend, fighting with your mom about wearing a crop top in public, and dieting.

It was just so raw, you know?

No, Jessica, just say no!

But I stopped reading when they started coming out with the inevitably crappy-ass spinoff.

You would think that the Wakefield twins entering the collegiate stage of their youth would be a more appropriate setting, given that they could actually do the precocious things they always bemoaned they couldn’t in their high school years (where sitting on the quarterback’s lap was as raunchy as it was going to get). Not to mention the fact that the quality of any book is automatically improved once all characters who wear letter jackets are removed.

Classy ass bookshelf right there.

But SVU books were a lot more… supernatural than their high school counterparts. Just tried way too hard to outdo the teenage shenanigans. (And not in a cool Animorphs kind of way.) I just got really confused when I finally turned to page 4398509 and just started getting really invested in Elizabeth’s new relationship, especially because she was such a straight-edge in high school, but then all of a sudden, she got bitten by a werewolf?

I DIDN’T SIGN UP FOR ANY OF THIS MYSTICAL BULLSHIT, YOU GUYS.

I can waste a lot of time trying to figure out exactly why SVU totally backfired and nearly ruined one of the defining cultural icons of my adolescence. In the end, it came down to either incompetent publishing editors or Francine getting writer’s block and trying to get rid of it with weed.

But the deal is this.

All the random insertions of vampires, haunted dorm rooms, and the occasional ski-mask creeper?

I mean… you do realize I can just go on the internet, visit a forum frequented by middle-aged housewives who go by usernames like cali_gurl69, and read fan fiction, right?

Just too much for me to handle, Frannie.

Too.

Much.

OMGZ u guyz!

I gradually segued from reading about bored, self-absorbed teenagers living in the SoCal suburbs to watching bored, self-absorbed teenagers living in the SoCal suburbs. (Why yes, there is only genre of entertainment these days.) But no show on Fox could never replace this huge part of my adolescent literary experience. Thanks to Fran’s weirdly satisfying form of Harlequin romances for grade schoolers, I know what’s really important in life.

Friends who don’t return borrowed shoes are skanks, not friends.

Feel so prepared for real life, y’all!

• jester shoes
• girdles
• animal noses

Wong Kar Wai not?

"Get out of the blogosphere. Right now. Just get out."

— Kani trying to help me with my problems

“Where were you when the Berlin Wall came down?”

“I guess John Mayer is the Leonard Cohen of my time.”

“Gosh, I graduated college so long ago. I still used a Razr! The iPhone hadn’t come out yet.”

“Where were you when that famous moon thing happened?”

“Were you around to see Gone with the Wind in theaters? That must have been so cool!”

“I never really got into Nirvana, they were a little before my time.”

“Was Ulysses S. Grant as badass as he seems in the history books?”

“I can’t believe Green Day is still around.”

“What’s a Jeff Beck?”

via Almie Rose

PLAY: “planetaria” // advantage Lucy

Trying to find the English translation of this song has been the most fruitless task I’ve undertaken in the past week.

Might even surpass that time I tried to legitimize myself listening to *NSYNC that one time Isa walked in on me.

Anyway.

Just one of those want-to-cry-and-listen-to-a-JC-Chasez-ballad days, y’all!

is making “Clean Coal” commercials because it’s like… guys… you’re selling coal.

Coal.

Coal.

(via drinkyourjuice)

"I’m writing another French paper and I’m writing about my life in France and how I found a cat and named him Marc and he was abandoned by his family and the vet told me he used to have owners because he was neutered, and I looked up the word neutered and it said it was castré, which sounds a little brutal and I was wondering if it was correct."

— Isa to Anna

Pro: warm weather.
Con: doing sweaty laundry three times a day.
Pro: expanded subway system.
Con: dealing with a subway system that’s essentially one dumbass loop.
Pro: Beijing duck.
Con: ducking through Beijing traffic.
Pro: backpacking in Mongolia.
Con: buying a new backpack.
Pro: Houhai.
Con: getting to Houhai from… anywhere else.
Pro: mocking bread vans.
Con: being mocked when in a bread van.
Pro: cheap stuff.
Con: haggling for “Louie Buitton.”
Pro: putting “er” at the end of every sentence.
Con: listening to “er” at the end of every sentence.
Pro: practically everyone I know will be there.
Con: practically everyone I know will be there.
Pro: walking distance to the Forbidden City.
Con: the city’s FORBIDDEN, helloooooooooo?

How did this pro con list just backfire?





Is it even possible that one person can be so inefficient, even with the help of so many bullet points?

Just want sum1 2 luv me 4 who I am~

@ the Sackler

Roni Horn’s installation piece based on Emily Dickinson’s poem, just getting me existential, sentimental, and all kinds of emotional fucked-up.

Feelin’ so d33p 2day~

The envy is overwhelming.

Might go watch some Anderson Cooper in a black t-shirt to console myself.